Why can’t I get motivated?

Why can’t I get motivated?

By Maria Mar(c)2010

Why can't you get motivated? Find out!

“Why can’t I get motivated?” Elizabeth asked me.

There are two different scenarios for depleted motivation: temporary and chronic.

I’ll cover the first one in this blog and the second one in a second blog, so stay tune. (Subscribe to this blog to get my weekly articles. Click the button to the upper right corner.)

Here’s the list of probable issues that are causing your de-motivation. To see the solutions, see the second section, below.

Temporary lack of motivation

If you are suffering from a temporary lack of motivation, then you are usually motivated, but find yourself in a motivational slump. Here are the causes that may be causing this slump.

1. Overwork. If you are burn-out, your body is depleted of energy. Your momentum slows down and your motivation suffers.

2. Taking too many ineffective actions. When your actions do not bring results, there is no renewal to the emotional energy you are using to generate them. Lack of results is like lack of food.

3. Plans and goals are not in harmony with your Purpose. Your path is not clear. The goals, plans or strategies you’ve laid out are not truly satisfying you. They may not be what your Soul desires or they may not be in harmony with your Life Purpose.

4. Doing too many difficult things for too long. Change is hard work. When you are changing the way you think, act and live, you are creating new pathways in your brain. This takes energy and it can take a toll in your passion.

5. Working hard without giving yourself rewards. If all you do is work, and you give yourself nothing to recognize the value of your work, then you are an oppressive boss to yourself. Your own “employees” are going to slow down and sabotage the enterprise.

6. Doing too many things you don’t like. Every project, whether it is personal or professional, has exciting, fun, creative things that you like to do and things that don’t like that much. If you are doing too many of the later and not enough of the things you like, you are killing your motivation.

7. Not receiving the results. Sometimes you expect certain results, but you get others instead. If you do not receive the results you get, because they are not the ones you expected, then you are repelling success. You are trying to control the flow of life, and rejecting the blessings life brings. You are depleting your own life force by placing a dike of limited expectations.

8. Feeling alone and abandoned. Have you asked for help? Have you engaged other experts to collaborate, guide or support you in your work? Have you shared your achievements, no matter how small, with your friends? If not, then you are trapped in the trance of Orphanhood. How can you be motivated?

9. Toxic environment. Are you surrounded by people who diminish your value, pressure you into betraying your dreams or constantly criticize or disbelief your goals? An environment that does not nurture your self-esteem and your dreams is toxic to your motivation.

Solutions

1. Overwork. Take a week or at least 4 days off. Get up late, go to bed early and take a nap. You should sleep at least 10 hours and rest at least 2 more. Spend at least one hour a day in nature. For women, being close to running water and walking barefoot on the earth renew our energy. Trees are powerful healers. Walk among them. Do things you like; alone and with your friends. Ask your Inner Child what she wants to do and then go have fun. When you regain energy and reconnect to the reason why you are doing what you are doing, the motivation will come back.

2. Taking too many ineffective actions. Your External Actions in the world are not working because there are hidden interferences “unweaving” what you weave, like the Myth of Penelope. You need to take Internal Actions to release the hidden interferences. Join my “I Want to Flourish” Fiesta to find free knowledge and resources.

3. Plans and goals are not in harmony with your Purpose. You need to stop your hectic doing and go within to listen to your Soul. You may be following Borrowed Dreams or Distorted Dreams. You need to go back to center in order to find your true path. Pre-order (or order) my novel. It will take you on a journey to heal this.

4. Doing too many difficult things for too long. You need to live in balance. Schedule fun, rest and pampering into your calendar. Balance difficult tasks with easy tasks. Give yourself time in the movies, a walk in the park and extra sleep during difficult jobs.

5. Working hard without giving yourself rewards. Reduce the number of tasks in your daily to-do list. Make sure you do the recommendations in the previous point. Buy some bright stars stickers and stick one at the end of each done task. At the end of each day, give yourself a round of applause and declare your accomplishments proudly. When you finish a project or achieve a goal, give yourself a great reward. Stop trying to do everything better. Value yourself and every little thing you do.

6. Doing too many things you don’t like. Balance your daily work by doing one thing you don’t like early in the morning followed by two things you love to do. Get or hire help to do the things you hate and the things that you are not good at.

7. Not receiving the results. When you send things into the world, open your mind and release the outcome. Receive every positive result that comes back. Open your heart and receive it in the knowledge that Life Mother knows better, and that Divine Design is at work. You will see how this seemingly insipid result multiplies its blessings in the future, better and farther than you could ever imagine.

8. Feeling alone and abandoned. Find your place of belonging with like-hearted people who support you. Ask your supportive friends for help. If you are unused to asking for help, you probably do not even see how others can help you. That’s your Orphanhood leading your life. You are not alone. Make an effort to find ways in which your friends can help you. Share your dreams with positive friends. Celebrate your goals with a party, dinner out or picnic.

9. Toxic environment. Examine how you invite, allow or are hooked with toxic people. Find memberships or communities of like-minded people who are seeking similar things. Get a mentor or coach. Avoid people who drain you or diminish your trust in your capacity or your dream, even if they are family. See them less, do not talk about your dreams or goals with them and place strong limits that disallow any negative comments. It may be tough at first, but they’ll eventually know not to step past your limits.

If you need more help, consider working under my mentorship and guidance.

Click here for more information.

Click here to register.

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About Maria Mar

Maria Mar is an author, speaker and ceremonialist poet. She is also a spiritual teacher and an internationally known shaman who helps you to achieve personal freedom, unlock your creative potential and live a life of magic and delight. She offers books, digital products and guidance, art that heals and transforms as well as performances, speaking engagements and other live and online events to help you become the protagonist of your life and the creator of your destiny. Find out more at Catch the Dream Express. If you want to flourish under Maria’s mentorship and guidance, visit http://www.dreamalchemist.com.

This material is the copyright of Maria Mar©2010. You can use this tip in your newsletter, blog or other digital media as long as you keep the copyright and biographical paragraph with the active link and send us notification.

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How are you stuck?

Hello beautiful sisters and brothers,

If your Fairy Godmother showed up right now at your door and said:

“Ring!” (That’s the doorbell, not the Fairy Godmother. You open the door and THEN she says:

“They sent me here because you’ve been complaining that you are stuck. So here I am, at your service. What do you want in order to get unstuck?”

Smart Alec that you are, you are ready to reply “Solve all my problems,” but she stops you before you open your mouth.

“Don’t get too smart. You should know better than trying to circumvent the inter-dimensional rules of the Convention on Fairy Non-intervention on Free Will for Humans!”

At this point, your head starts spinning. What is she talking about?

“That old genie stuff of granting three wishes is illegal right now, as it disempowers you and cuts off the flow of the Law of Attraction by interfering with your internal process. But you can engage my help for vision, insights, knowledge, detachment, release and anything else in which I can help you to fulfill your free will. Basically, you can ask me a question.”

You get a hold of yourself and think hard.

“By my magic wand!” the Fairy Godmother exclaims. “I can hear the wheels of your mind from where I stand. Let me help you.  I am going to ask you seven questions. Ah! Seven! My favorite number. It’s so magical! What was I saying? Oh, yes! I will ask you seven questions. If you answer them truthfully, by the end of my questions, you will know exactly what you need to ask to get unstuck. How about that?

Still unable to speak, you nod.

“I take that as a yes,” your Fairy Godmother comments, with a twist of her wand.

And she produces a magic link (below). Go ahead. Click it. You will see your Fairy Godmother’s questions. At the end you will be able (and ready) to ask the magical question that will help you get unstuck. Then your Fairy Godmother, who has hired me for the job, will answer your question and send the answer directly into your email box. Now, that’s magic!

Click the magic wand now!

Click this wand to Ask your Fairy Godmother.

Click the wand to Ask your Fairy Godmother.

Light and love,

Maria Mar

The Dream Alchemist

http://www.dreamalchemist.com

http://unstuckyourself.blogspot.com/p/virtual-party.html

NOTE: I hope that you understand this as a humorous call to complete the survey and understand that the answers will come from me. Of course, that is just the Mogul version of reality. If you are magical, you know that your Fairy Godmother has truly hired me for this job! ):

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About Maria Mar

Maria Mar is an author, speaker and ceremonialist poet. She is also a spiritual teacher and an internationally known shaman who helps you to achieve personal freedom, unlock your creative potential and live a life of magic and delight. She offers books, digital products and guidance, art that heals and transforms as well as performances, speaking engagements and other live and online events to help you become the protagonist of your life and the creator of your destiny. Find out more at Catch the Dream Express.


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How can I overcome low self-esteem?

LifeByte #4

How can I overcome low self-esteem

Question:

How can I overcome low self-esteem?

Asked by: Sherley

Answer:

Understand that the universe does not create anything unnecessary. The lowly worm helps break down the humus. The soil is loosened and mixed as the earthworm burrows through the ground. Thus, the worm is the great harvester of the tall trees and all that grows from the soil! Why would you be the only being without purpose or value on this universe?

Seen from this perspective, NOT to hold yourself in high esteem is an act of arrogance. You are judging that Earth Mother, that God or the Universal Consciousness, created something that is of no value just because you do not see the value in it.

Low self-esteem is learned. You were born being in touched with the stars, and knowing your place among them. Low self-esteem is a raggedy dress that others dumped over your radiance with their comments and put down. You have the power to release it.

“Yes, but how?” You are asking.

Use the power of your emotional Lighthouse.

Just as a lighthouse illuminates the ocean waters to bring ships to safe harbor, your emotions can illuminate your basic goodness to bring you to center and out of the Domestication Trance that stole your radiance consciousness.

Here’s how.

  1. Instead of attaching your emotions to your learned habit of berating your own worth, shift into this reflection any time you feel a low self-esteem attack coming.

“Sacred Universe (or God, Goddess, Earth Mother), every being you create has a purpose in the evolution of this universe. I am listening and seeing to discover the purpose you intend with my creation and existence. I open my heart that you may ignite my love for the unique being you created in me.”

2. Instead of judging yourself, look at both, your strength and weaknesses, your successes and failures, as part of the training that the Universe is giving you to prepare you for that purpose.

3. Instead of giving in to the illusion of worthlessness or insufficiency, shift into seeing yourself as the Universal Mother sees you: her radiant child, born of her to bring a gift to the world. Concentrate on this gift and release the illusion.

For more information, see the resources below.

Tool:

Digital Self-love Ceremony

This ceremony in a package contains an ebook, audio meditation and two posters for visual meditation that together comprise a ceremony to enhance self-love. If you want a gentle, but quick experience that can nourish self-love without being hard work, this is it.

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About Maria Mar

Maria Mar is an author, speaker and ceremonialist poet. She is also a spiritual teacher and an internationally known shaman who helps you to break through the hidden interference to your success, to unleash your Greatness and manifest the life of your dreams. She offers books, digital products and coaching, art that heals and transforms as well as performances, speaking engagements and other live and online events to help you become the protagonist of your life and the creator of your destiny. Find out more at Catch the Dream Express.

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How do you release limiting beliefs?


LifeBytes

Chunks of life at byte size. Easier to digest!

By the Dream Alchemist

LifeBytes are the cyber-version of  LifeBites On Stage.

QUESTION

How did you
release your limiting self beliefs?

Dalla

ANSWER

“Power is hard work.”

Those were thewords of my spiritual guides when they invited me into the Path of Freedom. This path lead to freedom from hundreds of past limiting beliefs. It freed my vast creative potential so that I AM my dream. By me walking this path, I am able to break things down for you, making it easier and faster. Here’s the short version.

Limiting beliefs are lies that at one point were sold to you (or you bought) as true.

They get solidify into a Reality Map. A Reality Map is a mental construct in your mind that is “fenced-in.” Anything fenced-in dislodges its opposite or its alternative. For example, if you create a Reality Map labeled “people are not to be trusted,” then you fence it in or embed it into your mind. It will automatically fence out or exclude the belief “I can find a trusting friend.” There are 16 building blocks that act to solidify or embed limiting beliefs in your mind. Using them in reverse can break these limiting beliefs.

See Expanded Lesson

Building Blocks

Limiting Beliefs or Reality Maps are solidify or embedded by the following forces or behavior:

  1. Childhood Trauma or Emotional Trauma

  2. Domestication Trance (consensus
    training during childhood)

  3. Environmental or Social reinforcement

  4. Absence of referential alternatives

  5. Fear or survival emotions

  6. Blame, guilt or toxic shame

  7. Attachment or identification

  8. Repetition

  9. Attention

  10. Renewal

  11. Emotional fuel

  12. Choices

  13. Denial

  14. Avoidance

  15. Rewards

  16. Love/hate connection

You can use these same building blocks to break down your limiting beliefs. But first, you need to find out the original belief. You cannot change what you do not see or accept. Once you do your tracking down and find out what is the source of your belief and how it was formed, you can then dissolve it.

Understand that limiting beliefs are created via intensity (in the case of a one-time trauma) or repetition and reinforcement. Don’t expect them to be dissolved overnight. You need the same repetition and reinforcement to break them down.

Some building blocks need to be reversed in order to break down a belief. For example, the building blocks of Attention, Denial and Attachment would become Release, Acceptance and Detachment. These attitudes would dislodge the embedded belief and eventually dissolve it.

You also need to reverse the building block Absence of Referential Alternatives. This is important because if you just keep hammering on the limiting belief, even if it’s to break it down, you are still enforcing it by giving it attention. Therefore, you need to reach out into the alternatives that have been fenced out or excluded in your mind and life by the false beliefs. You need to seek, discover, explore and embrace alternatives that are congruent with your desires and free choice. Then you
can solidify these alternatives using the 16 building blocks.

So now you know. Power is hard work, but it works! It’s worth every drop of sweat, every minute and every penny you invest in it. Why? Because it frees up your power to break free from the past and create the life you want .

Light and love

Maria Mar

The Dream Alchemist


http://www.catchthedreamexpress.com

Resources:

Tool:

Break Free from what Holds you Back

This package contains the guided experience and tools you need to break from limiting beliefs.

Women’s History Month Special!

Event:

Break Free from what Holds you Back

This event reveals more information about how limiting beliefs are created, about the fences in your mind and how to break them down.


Organizations, corporations or venues interested in my LifeBites ON
Stage, click below for more information.


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About Maria Mar

Maria Mar is an author, speaker and ceremonialist poet. She is also a spiritual teacher and an internationally known shaman who inspires women to manifest the life of their dreams. She offers books, digital products and coaching, art that heals and transforms as well as performances, speaking engagements and other live and online events to help you become the protagonist of your life and the creator of your destiny. Find out more at Catch
the Dream Express.

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How to remember dreams

I received a recent question about remembering dreams. Here is a quick primer for your Dreamtime.

1. Intent.Establish a clear intent before going to sleep. If you want answers, healing or a particular experience or guidance, communicate this clearly with your Spiritual Guides.

2. Circle of Light. As the above statement suggests, you need to get acquainted with your Circle of Light. This energy body may include any of the following: Protectors or Guardian Angels, Angels, Spiritual Guides and Teachers, your Ancestors, Power Animals and other spiritual entities that are like your Spirit Family. They speak in dreams. They can even help you effect significant transformation during dreams. How about beginning your dream quest by establishing your intent to get to know these entities?

3. Practical tools. To help on the practical side, have a large glass of water by the bed. Drink plenty before going to bed. This will wake you up to go to the bathroom. When you come back to bed, drink some more water. That will help you move from Dreamtime into Beta state, back and forth. This helps you catch the dream before it goes.

4. Catching the thread. When you wake up, stay silent and still in bed. Keep your eyes closed. Don’t go into your mind to think about what you have to do. In this empty mind, you will get some images, sensations or “threads” of your last dream. Breathe deeply and slowly and follow that thread with undivided attention, until you can reconstruct the dream.

5. Dream Journal. Keep a dream journal. Write your dreams. When you re-read these dreams, you will get great insight into your subconscious. You will get to know the many dimensions of your True Self.

I hope this helps.

Light and love,

Maria Mar

The Dream Alchemist

Resources: for help with your dreams, you may want to visit a specialist on dreams. While I work with dreams, I am more focused on dreaming your life, in wakeful dreaming. But one of our recommended Dream Team experts, Diane Brandon, works with dreams. Here is her website:

http://www.dianebrandon.com

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Maria Mar is an author, speaker and ceremonialist poet. She is also a spiritual teacher and an internationally known shaman who inspires women to manifest the life of their dreams. Find out more at Catch the Dream Express.

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To succeed you must hire yourself

Last week a visitor asked the following question:

“I just found your site and appreciate what you have on here. I a network marketer, but haven’t yet experienced the success I want in it. Your obsession vs focus interview is great for me and something I will keep mulling over. I am looking for direction in building belief in myself and my business. I hesitate to talk to others about it because I think, they have a good job, or good business, why would they want this or listen to me. I do think I have a unique (better) business plan, and products. So I think it must rest in my belief in me. Suggestions?”

DREAM ALCHEMIST’S ANSWER:

Starting today and for a year, consider yourself on a Journey of Success. This quest is not a race. Observe that I did not call it a Journey TO Success, but a Journey OF Success. It is not even a project. It is an adventure, an expedition. In this exciting journey, you want to enjoy the landscape. You want to visit its inhabitants and admire its beauty. You want to learn the language and understand the culture of the people.

The landscape you will meet in this journey is really an inscape. It is the Inscape of your Affluence. You will travel inside your underground relationship to affluence. I like this word for three reasons.

1. It looks beyond money. I believe that focusing on money when we want prosperity is like focusing on easting pasta when we really want to visit Italy. Money is great, but it is a tiny detail in the big picture of affluence.

2. It comprehends the many aspects of abundance and prosperity, including our attitude.

3. It comes from the Latin root “Fluere”, to flow. It includes the flow of the Law of Attraction and the flow of abundance in the universe.

I am going to give you 4 start-up gifts for your journey.

The first one is this post.

The second one is a post called “Prosperity or Poverty: Choose your Mirror.”

The third one is a post called “Raising your Prosperity Ceiling.”

The fourth one is a shamanic journey meditation called “Shifting the World for instant manifestation.

Put these traveling tools in your suitcase as you begin your Journey of Success. During this entire year you will be on a ceremony that connects you with your Higher Powers. This is what I recommend you do:

  1. Begin every morning with Gratitude.
    When you place your feet on the floor, say your version of the following:
    “Thank you for this new day of affluence in all aspects of my life.”
  2. Show appreciation in every meal by blessing it and naming its healing power. For example: “Thank you for this oatmeal that makes my heart strong.”
  3. Every night, light a candle and ask for help and guidance in your dreams. At that time, you can be guided with the least resistance and can receive enlightenment, powerful images to decode your unconscious, shifts of consciousness and much more. Go to bed in a receptive, listening mode with a peaceful expectation that you will be helped and guided. Keep a dream journal.

In between these tasks, during the day, I want you to track down the following elements, and write everything in a journal that you examine one day a week, on the same day and hour, as part of the year-long quest.

MONTH NO.1

Ascertain your Soul’s Purpose

Track down the level of enthusiasm and passion you feel for what you do as a network marketer and for your website. Compare it to the things that make you the happiest and bring you the greatest satisfaction.

Let’s say that caring for your dog is something that fills you with love and satisfaction. It’s one of the things that you most love to do. Then that’s a 10. Compared to that, how much enthusiasm and passion does your website and marketing job elicits?

Keep an eye for situations that let you know about what elicits your enthusiasm, how you feel and what you attract.

This is a key research that precedes any other. You need to know if you are fulfilling your Soul’s purpose doing this. Your joy, enthusiasm, satisfaction and passion are your thermometer for this.

I suspect that you have been focusing on success by looking outward: where the money is, where your market may be, what you may or may not be doing. While these things are great, they are not the source. Your new approach is a great intuition. Focus inward.

To succeed, you must hire yourself. To hire yourself, you must believe in yourself.

But you cannot “make” yourself believe in yourself if what you are doing is not what you came here to do and is not something you LOVE to do and something that makes you feel GOOD about your contribution to the world. You can’t fake belief. It comes from your Soul and it is the state of your Essence.

MONTH NO. 2

Track down unconscious programming

Understand this: your conscious desires cannot be manifested at their maximum potential if there is an unconscious programming to the contrary.

Our conscious mind runs from1% to 5% of our lives. Our subconscious runs the rest. There are deep-seated programs there with  beliefs and perceptions learned very early on. There are layers of personas, called Shadow Selves and Wounded Selves carrying these learned beliefs. There is an Emotional Undertow of muddy, toxic emotions connected to these beliefs. If you stay in the surface, life may seem easier. But you will not be able to track down the formidable forces that are pulling you down and under, away from your goals and dreams.

For more information on this, visit Dr. Bruce Lipton’s office. I recommend his book, The Biology of Belief. Here’s the website:

http://www.brucelipton.com/

The conduit to the subconscious is the BodySoul Compass. Use breath, visualization and shamanic journey or meditation to get in touch with your underworld. Once you find out the hidden  layers of beliefs that sabotage you, you can then use Energy Healing and visualization to remove those programs and implant your own desires in your subconscious. This is an ongoing process for your year-long adventure.

To access any issues that may be sabotaging your prosperity, visit this page:

http://www.psych-k.com/pages/prosperity.php

MONTH 3

Release the Dam within

The source of prosperity is your connection to the River of Affluence, the abundant flow of abundance in the universe.These river is ongoing. The Universe is a dynamic self-healing, self-nurturing, self-expanding ocean of energy.

But sometimes, for the reasons explained above, we have unconscious blocks that create a dam. That’s when the river cannot reach us, showering us with the abundance of the universe.

My first instinct with you is that it is blocked at the level of passion and uniqueness. Uniqueness does not mean better. It means that what you offer is blessed with YOUR presence, gifts and talents. Whether this uniqueness block is due to the fact that you are in the wrong track or to unconscious programming, or both –the effect is going to be easily seen in your life and your business offers.

Look at your website and other marketing tools. Is this a pleasurable, exciting, welcoming, delicious, “oh-so-you” invitation to your potential clients? Or is this more of the same marketing language and colors find anywhere? Why should anyone come here to shop?

Would you? Why?

For help with freeing your uniqueness, accessing the sources of self-sabotage and expressing your uniqueness in your business and website, consider coaching with me at:

http://www.catchthedreamexpress.com/coaching.htm

MONTH 4

Expression Make-over

In our result-driven society we often think that “believing in the self” is simply about the right angle, the right “rap.” We see words and actions as things to be manipulated for an end.

Your words and actions are an expression of who you are. They are your unique creation. This creation has the power to create your world, a world unlike any other. This is what genius and originality is all about.

  • Know yourself.
  • Love who you are.
  • Express who you are with joy and passion.
  • Express your love and passion in what you do.
  • Connect with like-hearted people to grow this love collectively.

Your words are the expression of your inner world, which in turn creates your outer world. How are the words you use to market expressing your inner world? Your values? Your personality? Your causes? Your passion? What world are they creating?

Observe how you write and talk about your service to others; not only clients, but friends. What words you use? What expressions you use? How do you feel about them? Ask your friends if they feel curious or motivated to check out your products after you talk to them like that. Ask them if they are clear on this:

Why do YOU provide this service? Notice the emphasis on YOU. Your friends know who you are and what you care about. Does this service and the way you present it match who you are?

If they feel that it doesn’t, ask them to help you brainstorm some new phrases that are more like you. Perhaps you are sassy. Then your approach should reflect that in snappy, funny comments. Perhaps you are elegant. Then that should come across.

Of course, if you have realized that the reason you are not successful is because this is not really what you want to do, the journey here goes into finding what you LOVE to do and how to generate affluence from it.

Meditate deeply on your purpose. What do you want to bring into your clients’ life? What are your gifts? Don’t just talk marketing rap. Be REAL!

MONTH 5

Design for success

Now that you know if you are doing what you are supposed to do and you’ve hired yourself to do it by bringing your true self to shine in your words and marketing text, it’s time to bring this passion into the visual aspects of it.

It is time to look at your website, blog or anything else that is the container of your offer.

Does it have your branding? There’s a lot of talk about branding. But this is the way I see it from my shamanic perspective. Is your presence here? Can I connect to you and trust you? Does it sing your Power Song, your unique, beautiful, joyful passionate song expressing who you are and offering your unique gifts?

I see a LOT of ugly websites out there. I know that they are following marketing “rules” –but they are UGLY! They turn me off. I want to run out of there. They are impersonal, cold, pushy, difficult to read and scream “GIVE ME YOUR MONEY and get out of here!”

As a designer, I am always curious. Why are so many webmasters using black backgrounds when they have zero degree of readibility? Why do they make everything so square? Especially if the owner is a woman or is marketing to women. We love curves!

Why are they stuck on black, white, red or some beige tones? Did someone die in this cyberspace? Color is passion. Look at nature. Get inspired. Express your passion and uniqueness through color.

What do you want your visitors to feel when they reach your website? Enthusiasm? Clarity? Peace? Renewal and energy? Then seek the colors and lines that will make this happen. Think outside the box.

Take time to strategize on how you can bring your presence to your marketing containers. As I am a designer also, here are several clues.

  • Colors
  • Lines and curves
  • Your photo, looking at the visitor, smiling or laughing or in any other appropriate attitude that says YOU! People don’t buy from websites. They buy from people. Put your face up there, so I can see you.
  • Your voice up front, telling me in your own sassy, elegant or sweet voice why I am special to you and how you take care of me in this shopping experience, etc. Audio is nice, but it can be your written words carrying your voice and speaking directly and lovingly to me.

Five months have gone by. The entire course of your life may have changed. If not, now you are clear on your life’s purpose and how to convey it uniquely. You are working with any hidden programming that sabotages you, opening the flow of abundance from within. Your website and marketing language now express your personal power and uniqueness, connecting to others. What’s next?

Now begins your easiest and hardest task.

MONTH 6

Open yourself to receive.

You may laugh. But I assure you that in my work as a spiritual teacher, shaman and life coach I have found that MOST people have problems receiving. I see people working very hard, almost to exhaustion, for blessings that they cannot receive. They will repel the very thing they prayed for. They will work hard, but let it pass them by.

We desperately need to learn how to receive.

Allow the River of Affluence that constantly runs through all of life to run through you, to bathe you in prosperity and to run through you into the world, bringing beautiful gifts to others.

Let go of pushing, effort, hardship and struggle.

Allow. Receive. Release. Enjoy.

Repeat these mantra like a chant all day long.

“I receive the affluence that is already streaming througth me. I receive, allow and enjoy it.”

In the process of practicing these powers, which –by the way– are gifts from your Shakti Power, the Goddess and Female Force in you, you will attract streams of afluence. Be awake. Recognize opportunities. Be open.

Allow. Receive. Enjoy.

After these first six months, you will see an increase in affluence and you will know what to do next.

Here is my blessing:

May your heart open like a sunflower to receive the light and passionate life force of the Source of affluence in your life, as it shines now and always.

Light and love,

Maria Mar

The Dream Alchemist

If you need more help, consider benefiting from my personal coaching services. Find out more at: http://www.catchthedreamexpress.com/coaching.htm

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You can use this quote in ezines, web pages and other online media as long as you include my name and copyright mark and the paragraph below, with functional link:

Maria Mar is the Dream Alchemist, an inspirational speaker, poet, coach, author and spiritual teacher who helps women create the life of their dreams. Visit her at: Catch the Dream Express!

Why Toxic People don’t like your Personal Boundaries

Why Toxic People

don’t like your Personal Boundaries

By Maria Mar(c)

This post is a response to one of the questions asked in the Toxic Relationships Survey that I posted in Polldaddy.

You asked the following question:

Why do some people have such difficult time accepting and respecting boundaries that other people put in place? Why do they take it personally?

The Toxic Relationships Self-help Kit

The Toxic Relationships Self-help Kit

Like everything else that relates to humans, there is no generic answer to this question. Toxic People come in several varieties. This means that there are, at least, half a dozen answers to this question. I will discuss three here. For more information, you can check the Toxic Relationships Self-help Kit.

Comfort Dwellers

These people ―who can be toxic, or not― know and accept only what is comfortable and safe for them, which means that

  • It’s habitual,
  • It’s part of their inherited beliefs and worldview, or
  • It’s accepted by the mass trance, which is their only vision of reality.

If your personal limits go beyond any of these familiar parameters, the Comfort Dwellers will find them alien, unreasonable and yes, they make take it as a personal insult or rejection. At the very least, they will take your limits as a personal extravagance that you are asking them to endure.

Since Comfort Dwellers understand safety and comfort, present your personal boundaries as the parameters where you feel safe and comfortable and ask them to support you. If they are not toxic, they will. If they are toxic, their response will have to do with whether that particular boundary you raise activates their Toxic Field or not. If it does, they will discharge their poison. It’s up to you to not take it personally or distance yourself appropriately.

Terrified Tweeters

If you read the sample chapter in the Toxic Relationships Self-help Kit, you know that the Terrified Tweeters are people who are living in fear. To cover up or address this fear, they stay safely within the Walls of Expectations that they have inherited or built. This means that:

  • They haven’t questioned their inherited beliefs and are trapped in a normalcy script that they call “reality,”
  • They have not questioned their own personal myths about themselves because they have not given themselves enough attention,
  • They are terrified of looking beneath the lies and illusions of their dysfunctional family of origin to see the truth, or
  • They will do anything to avoid pain, which has lead to the betrayal of their True Self and their Personal Dream.

To some Terrified Tweeters, your personal boundaries feel like stabs in the heart. Why? Because they have not dared to set their own boundaries. Why? Because they have not dared to take the time to know themselves, love themselves or establish their unique experience. To other Terrified Tweeters, your boundaries seem selfish, rude or a rejection. These tweeters are trapped in social scripts and have betrayed their own uniqueness. Your insistence on being yourself triggers their Toxic Fields, and they feel compelled to discharge their toxic emotions.

Since Terrified Tweeters live in fear, anything that you can do to assure them that you love and accept them and that you are not asking them to do what you do will help alleviate their fear. Keep those boundaries clear, however. There may be a need to distance yourself in those activities or areas that trigger their Toxic Fields. The good news is that once your Personal Dream is manifested and your goals achieved, some Terrified Tweeters may in fact, seek you out to learn how to accomplish their own dreams with the least amount of pain. Others, however, will escalate their toxic discharge because you have now grown from a vague threat to a successful threat to their status quo.

Darth Vaders

Though the Darth Vaders also come in different varieties, they are either

  • Conscious of your personal rights and needs, but unwilling to honor them, or
  • So submerged in their own darkness or misery that they enjoy taunting you as a way of feeding their Shadows.

As far as toxic people come, the Darth Vaders are the least common variety and the easiest to detect. They are also the most deadly. What would you do if you saw a vampire? Make that boundary as impenetrable a shield as the cross is to vampires, and run as far as your legs take you!

Ultimately, your personal boundaries are there to serve you. As we are all one, however, in serving you, your personal boundaries should also help others. At the least, they should improve your relationship with those that can vibrate at your own frequency.

Raise your personal limits with love and respect to others. That is all you can do. Those who cannot accept them are trapped in their own limitations. If they take it personally, don’t make the same mistake. Don’t take their response personally. Release them to their personal choices and detach from their personal limits.

When you release people to their choices, miraculous things happen. Sometimes, that’s all that is needed for them to come around.

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Has this helped you? Let me know in your comments. If you receive this via email, click here to comment.

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To ask your question and share your opinions on toxic relationships, take 3 minutes to answer the survey at: http://surveys.polldaddy.com/s/65557601854217B2/

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Read more about the Toxic Relationships Self-help Kit at: http://www.catchthedreamexpress.com/toxicrelationships-self-help_kit.htm

Light and love,

Maria Mar

The Dream Alchemist

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Maria Mar(c)

You can use this article in ezines, web pages and other online media as long as you include my name and copyright mark and the paragraph below, with functional link:

Maria Mar is the Dream Alchemist, an inspirational poet, speaker, coach, author and spiritual teacher who helps women create the life of their dreams. Visit her at: Catch the Dream Express!